MTN NG told me a while ago that they will call my mobile number in the next 24 hours to tell me how I won one million naira and a free ticket to South Africa 2010 football fiesta. Folks, here is how it happened:
At exactly 04.09 this morning, I woke up when my phone buzzed, only to receive the following message from “MTN NG”
You are a winner of (NI,000,000.00 & a free ticket to the 2010 W/CUP). Visit (www.yellofifa.com) immediately for verification: code: 462070.
I chuckled and went back to sleep. Our 419ers never rest; always awake (even at 4.00am) looking for who to dupe. Before I dozed off again, my mind went to the story I heard of some IT guys who ply their trade by designing websites for these 419ers.
This fired my curiousity about yellofifa.com - I wanted to see how perfect a419 site could be. I got to the office, and this was the first thing I checked out. Bang on! Yellofifa was a near-perfect reproduction of the MTN website, with a prominent instruction in red that read:
If you have received a message from our sms Gateway as one of the FIFA GAME SHOW winners you are requested to verify your Code here.
Phone Number
Winning Code
Click here to verify
I chuckled again and decided to play their game. First, I entered a wrong phone number and a wrong code, and I got the following result:
“The mobile number and the winning code cannot be found in our database. Please ensure that your mobile number and code is correct.”
Okay; I put my phone number and the wrong code and I got the same result
“The mobile number and the winning code cannot be found in our database. Please ensure that your mobile number and code is correct.”
I did not give up: I put the wrong phone number (09034528765) and the correct code supplied, and what do you know, I hit the bulls eye:
Congratulations!! Your winning has been verified, you are requested to carefully follow the instructions below!!
And the instructions?
you are requested to follow the necessary steps to complete you verification, You are strictly requested not to disclose your winning code to anyone else, As some one else could claim your price. Follow the steps and carefully fill the boxes below.
Below is the information that I filled in the boxes supplied:
Full Name: Shokoloko Bangoshay
Date of Birth: 21/12/2009
Home Address: State House, Abuja
Phone Number: 09023417654 (a different number from the above, but still a non-existent number)
Occupation: Mendicant
Nationality: Non Nigerian
State: Las Vegas
City: Oklahoma
Religion : Communist(Options: Christian, Muslim, Communist, None)
“Verify Again” I did and found that they were satisfied with the information given above, as I was moved on to the next stage:
Instructions: Provide your banking details; you will be required to verify your account to ensure that it really belongs to you
Very good point, I noted, since I may be foolish enough to want to go and give another person the N1m that I won, or my free ticket to SA for that matter.
So I proceeded to give them my account details, as follows:
Account Name: Shokoloko Bangoshay
Account Number: 234560000000212
Select Bank: Xchange Card
Click to verify
I did, again, and for 30 seconds, all I saw was the message:
Processing … Do not interrupt…..
Finally, I got what looked like an impatient response
Your account has not been verified, you are requested to confirm that this account really belongs to you by filling the boxes and click proceed to continue verification. For assistance or difficulties click live support to chat with an MTN operator.
I looked up and saw the Live Support panel, only it had this legend:
“Need Assistance? Live Support is Unavailable.”
So that left me with filling the form again, and I proceeded as before, although this time, the boxes contained more options, as follows:
Account Name: Shokoloko Bangoshay
Account Number: 234560000000212
Phone Number: 09023487654 (changed the number a third time)
Bank Name: Xchange Card
ATM Card Number: 234560000000212
ATM Exp Date: 08/10/2004
PIN Number - Click numbers to enter pin. 4321
The ATM expiry date had two options (MM/YY) but I found that I could supply DD as well, so I wrote that my card would expire in 08/10/2004. I attempted to continue the prank with PIN number but when I got to 43215 the site warned that “the pin is supposed to be four numbers!” and so I desisted and stopped at 4321
Click to verify:
I did, and this time around, I received a cryptic and very impatient message:
Your details are incorrect. Crosscheck and re-enter details.
And I did that – exactly as before.. and what do you know? I finally hit the jackpot of an answer?
“Thank you! Your winning has been verified. We shall call your mobile number in the next 24 hours.”
Do I hear congratulations for my winning entry? I love Nigeria -- an amazing country where one can win N1m and a free ticket to the World Cup without playing any lottery or entering any competition!
Musings of a suitably mystified Nigerian, mystified at the way that the continent of Africa and its peoples manage to often snatch defeats from the jaws of victory.
Wednesday, August 12, 2009
Sunday, August 9, 2009
The Secret Photo of My Sin
My favorite preacher waxed eloquent today, with a story that had a sting in the tail. He was explaining the First Book of Kings (Ch.19 Vs.4-8) – the story of Prophet Elijah who gave up the struggle, and asked God to take his life. His thesis was that most people, when confronted with overwhelming problems, run from pillar to post, looking for shortcuts to their problem rather than work hard, hope in God, and pray for a solution.
The preacher told the story of a barren woman who, in her desperation to have a child, visited all sorts of seedy places, looking for who could assist her to overcome her burden.
“In this sort of situation, women are usually the special advisers,” he said. They will heckle and urge: “Have you seen this big pastor? Have you visited this man of God? Have you seen that herbalist?.”
One fateful day, the woman was given the name of Best Pastor, and told to go to him because a trial will conceive (sorry, convince) her. So she went.
“Strip” the pastor ordered, and the woman meekly obeyed. The pastor’s photographer, lurking behind, promptly stepped forward and took a picture of the naked woman. He (the pastor) proceeded to do his work, "as if he has the power to give a baby," the preacher said.
Three months later, the man of the house noticed that his wife had been raiding their joint account. He investigated further, to discover that she had also emptied her personal account – and the couple of millions she had was all gone.
Knowing how desperate his wife was to have a baby, the husband suspected what must have happened and quietly put a tail on his wife. His private investigator eventually trailed her to the big pastor’s house. On getting the report, he promptly went to the police to report how his wife was being duped.
The police set their trap. One day, the unsuspecting woman went to the bank and withdrew the remaining N100,000 from their joint account and took off on one more rendezvous with the dupe.
… Without knowing that police were on her tail.
When the pastor was caught red-handed, the husband appeared and began hurling abuses at him.
The pastor burst into uproarious laughter. To the perplexed onlookers, he offered an explanation:
“See this woman?” he said, pointing to the barren lady, “she was once a mad woman, going about the streets naked! They brought her to me to be cured. And I did. See how respectable and responsible she now looks! Yet I am being accused!
“This is an ungrateful world” he told the police officers who were getting set to arrest him.
And with that, he excused himself, went into the house and soon came out with the picture of the very naked poor lady. He showed the picture to the police and asked the lady to deny that she was the one.
She could not.
The Police, according to the preacher, warned the man and left the pastor in peace.
Our Church broke into an indulgent chuckle. Tall story, we told ourselves; but funny one at that.
“You may think the story is far-fetched, but the woman I am referring to is in this church today!” the preacher said, with a deadpan expression on his face.
The Church went quiet.
He allowed a deep pause, and then repeated his claim.
“I say she is here; I would say that all of you know who she is!”
Nobody moved. The silence and sense of expectation were palpable.
“I say she is in church; or didn’t she come to church today?” he asked.
Apprehension set in. People turned and looked at each other, then back to greet the preacher with the same dumbfounded stare.
It was the preacher’s turn to chuckle.
“Okay, let me put it this way: If God behaves like this pastor, and His angels take photographs of all the secret things we have been doing all our lives, including the ones that each of us did this past week, what do you think?
“Think about it. We are all very clever at hiding the horrible things we do, but the pictures of our secret lives are being taken and stored. If the angels brought our own secret photographs to Church this morning and posted them on the bulletin board, how many of us will be better than the naked barren woman?
“Indeed, how many of us will be able to return to this church after today, if the world knows our little secrets?”
The journalist in me took over, as I took a quick scan of adult faces in the church.
They were a study.
It was like an eternity: nobody moved.
But mercifully, the preacher gave us a soft landing, telling us, as usual, that God loves us and wants us to repent of our sins and return to Him.
My people began breathing again.Phew!
The preacher told the story of a barren woman who, in her desperation to have a child, visited all sorts of seedy places, looking for who could assist her to overcome her burden.
“In this sort of situation, women are usually the special advisers,” he said. They will heckle and urge: “Have you seen this big pastor? Have you visited this man of God? Have you seen that herbalist?.”
One fateful day, the woman was given the name of Best Pastor, and told to go to him because a trial will conceive (sorry, convince) her. So she went.
“Strip” the pastor ordered, and the woman meekly obeyed. The pastor’s photographer, lurking behind, promptly stepped forward and took a picture of the naked woman. He (the pastor) proceeded to do his work, "as if he has the power to give a baby," the preacher said.
Three months later, the man of the house noticed that his wife had been raiding their joint account. He investigated further, to discover that she had also emptied her personal account – and the couple of millions she had was all gone.
Knowing how desperate his wife was to have a baby, the husband suspected what must have happened and quietly put a tail on his wife. His private investigator eventually trailed her to the big pastor’s house. On getting the report, he promptly went to the police to report how his wife was being duped.
The police set their trap. One day, the unsuspecting woman went to the bank and withdrew the remaining N100,000 from their joint account and took off on one more rendezvous with the dupe.
… Without knowing that police were on her tail.
When the pastor was caught red-handed, the husband appeared and began hurling abuses at him.
The pastor burst into uproarious laughter. To the perplexed onlookers, he offered an explanation:
“See this woman?” he said, pointing to the barren lady, “she was once a mad woman, going about the streets naked! They brought her to me to be cured. And I did. See how respectable and responsible she now looks! Yet I am being accused!
“This is an ungrateful world” he told the police officers who were getting set to arrest him.
And with that, he excused himself, went into the house and soon came out with the picture of the very naked poor lady. He showed the picture to the police and asked the lady to deny that she was the one.
She could not.
The Police, according to the preacher, warned the man and left the pastor in peace.
Our Church broke into an indulgent chuckle. Tall story, we told ourselves; but funny one at that.
“You may think the story is far-fetched, but the woman I am referring to is in this church today!” the preacher said, with a deadpan expression on his face.
The Church went quiet.
He allowed a deep pause, and then repeated his claim.
“I say she is here; I would say that all of you know who she is!”
Nobody moved. The silence and sense of expectation were palpable.
“I say she is in church; or didn’t she come to church today?” he asked.
Apprehension set in. People turned and looked at each other, then back to greet the preacher with the same dumbfounded stare.
It was the preacher’s turn to chuckle.
“Okay, let me put it this way: If God behaves like this pastor, and His angels take photographs of all the secret things we have been doing all our lives, including the ones that each of us did this past week, what do you think?
“Think about it. We are all very clever at hiding the horrible things we do, but the pictures of our secret lives are being taken and stored. If the angels brought our own secret photographs to Church this morning and posted them on the bulletin board, how many of us will be better than the naked barren woman?
“Indeed, how many of us will be able to return to this church after today, if the world knows our little secrets?”
The journalist in me took over, as I took a quick scan of adult faces in the church.
They were a study.
It was like an eternity: nobody moved.
But mercifully, the preacher gave us a soft landing, telling us, as usual, that God loves us and wants us to repent of our sins and return to Him.
My people began breathing again.Phew!
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